but it really is so important to find people who don’t lose patience with you or get angry if you’re being irrational or insecure or downright ridiculous, it is so so necessary to be treated with gentleness from loved ones and not to be made to feel like you’re irritating or a burden
“fernweh [feyrn-vey]”—(noun) This wonderful, untranslatable German word describes the feeling of homesickness for a far away land, a place you have never visited. Do not confuse this with the english word, wanderlust; Fernweh is much more profound, it is the feeling of an unsatisfied urge to escape and discover new places, almost a sort of sadness. You miss a place you have never experienced, as opposed to lusting over it or desiring it like wanderlust. You are seeking freedom and self-discovery, but not a particular home. (via petrichour)
“Please know that there are much better things in life than being lonely or liked or bitter or mean or self conscious. We are all full of shit. Go love someone just because, I know your heart may be badly bruised, or even the victim of numerous knifings but it will always heal even if you don’t want it to, it keeps going. There are the most fantastic, beautiful things and people out there, I promise. It’s up to you to find them.”—Chuck Palahniuk (via thinksquad)
My heart hurts. i can’t find a way to end the ache. I just want peace. I want to BE ok, instead of telling myself i’m ok. Solitude is not solace right now. It is isolation. It is loneliness. I am lost.
I am alone. It has always been so.
"You have wonderful parents and your sister and your friends and me. Just open up to us. You may be surprised."
That’s what he said.
It’s not true tho.
My family has enough burdens, they don’t need mine. I’m enough trouble as it is.
My friends… they are temporary. I love them, but i have learned the hard way that ppl care only so much as it is convenient for them to do so.
I have never ‘had’ him.
He keeps his distance, unless & until the mood strikes. It is pain. Pure pain.
I am tired.
I am lost.
But I made myself be ok before; I must do it again. That is the only solution.
Except this time, i don’t know how… and i’m drowning as i try.
I was strong before- where has my strength gone???